While on a short vacation in Brussels with a group of friends from Singapore, we chanced upon a street with several restaurants or cafes selling seafood. Remembering that that place is quite famous for its mussels, we decided to find the restaurant with the best deal to try the delicacy.
As we walked down the street, we were constantly interrupted by waiters from different restaurants. With bright smiling faces, they shoved menus into our hands and guaranteed us the best offer in town. We eventually decided on one and happily went in to find a seat. Being on a budget trip and just wanting to sample the food, we intended to order one set meal for every two people. However, when we read our orders to the waiter, he sternly said, “That’s all?! How about you…you..you?” When we told him we were going to share, he loudly exclaimed, “NO NO no…no such thing!..” and he subsequently chased us out of the restaurant, creating quite a din since we were quite a large group.
After what seemed like an attempt to humiliate us, we proceeded to find another restaurant and made sure to specify that we were going to share food. We did find one eventually and enjoyed our time still.
The reason I said “what seemed like an attempt to humiliate us” is because my group of friends and I found the situation rather amusing instead. Of course, we couldn’t help but feel indignant initially but it quickly wore off.
I think one major source of conflict was the language barrier. While the waiter could speak English, his understanding was minimal so it was difficult for us to communicate with him from the beginning. The waiter probably became irritated when we had to ask several questions about the menu because it was in French. Another source was probably the wrong assumption we had that Cafes in Paris and Brussels operated in a similar manner (wouldn’t mind us sharing food). Perhaps what we thought looked like a cafe was in fact a more formal restaurant (where it would be poor etiquette to share food). Or was it the restaurant’s attempt to get more money out of us?
Wells, at least now we know what to do should we enter another restaurant in Brussels 🙂
ES2007S Professional Communication 
Alex Said:
on February 20, 2010 at 4:29 pm
After reading your post, it makes me wonder is there always a food culture in every country. My experience told me about Japan and yours about France. Singapore have our own culture as well. I think we can conclude from here that food ethics exist everywhere. We should always be conscious about how we act in diners of other country, or should i say when we are in other people’s territory. Taking cultural ethics for granted would only bring us trouble.=)
Ms. Lim Said:
on February 21, 2010 at 10:33 am
Dear Jia Lin,
Thank you for sharing with us this vacation encounter. Did you (eventually) find out how to tell a cafe and a restaurant apart?
This is an interesting post, highlighting what is acceptable / unacceptable in different cultures. Thanks for the effort!
Bryan Said:
on February 24, 2010 at 4:28 pm
Hi Jia Lin,
Like you, I have also had an interesting experience in restaurants in France. Unlike the experience you had which involved sharing food, mine was because I asked for chilli sauce for my beef steak. This was a big insult to them, given that the French, or I would say Europeans in general take great pride in their food, and it was a great insult to them when I asked for sauce.
Yes, sometimes we inevitably get to learn about another countries culture the hard way. Things such as merely sharing a dish in a restuarant may be something that is really trivial to us, but it may be actually something totally unexpected, out of the ordinary, or maybe even something that is totally unacceptable.
I guess all of us must take the pain and trouble of finding out about the culture of that particular country, especially if we have not visited the place before! Thanks for sharing! =)
Cheers,
Bryan
Madhu Said:
on February 24, 2010 at 5:40 pm
Hey Jia Lin,
After reading your post and recalling all the similar experiences I have had, it made me realize how important a role food and eating habits play in cultural diversity. It’s amazing how a perfectly normal eating habit in one culture can be totally unacceptable in another. One example I can provide is the use of hands to eat food in many South Asian cultures. I believe that if you walk in to a restaurant in a Western or European country and started eating using your hands, they would find it to be extremely rude and vulgar. However, if you go to a South Asian house and started eating using cutlery, the hosts would consider it to be offensive.
So rather than having to face such uncomfortable situations, I believe if you learn about the cultural habits beforehand, it would be quite helpful indeed to avoid embarrassing situations.
Anyway, thanks for sharing your experience. I’ll certainly keep it in mind if I ever go to a restaurant in Brussels 😉
Madhu
Student A Said:
on April 21, 2010 at 8:51 am
Hi,
Quite an interesting experience you have there. Well, you mentioned that you were being shoved menus. This gave me an impression that the restaurants were not very crowed. Hence I wonder why they will actually reject customers. I mean it’s not like you all are not paying right ? Well, I guessed you are right. Maybe it’s their culture or some dining etiquette issues. Glad to hear that you all managed to find another place to dine.
xoxo,
Student A